If you’re one of those people who notices the tiny things about speech and how it affects people, you may notice that I cringe at the words “Heavy Metal”. Put away your pitchforks, and unhand me you ruffians, for I love Metal in all shapes and forms, I just don’t like that particular combination of words. It’s gross. It’s dusty. It makes you sound 50. Not that there’s anything wrong with that… Hi mom!
Even in reference to the substances like Mercury or Lead, I’m just euughghh. Worst is using NWOBH as a genre when it’s clearly a time period, you fuckwits! Gah. What was the point of this post? Oh yeah, Heavy Metal is not the defining term for bands like ‘Maiden, ‘Priest, or ‘Witch(not Skeleton, but Angel).
I cannot accept this at all. If I were a regular abuser of the term “Heavy Metal” it would be the umbrella genre under which Black, Death, Doom, Speed, Thrash, Symphonic, Power, some of the more intense Hard Rock, and even Nu-Metal to an extent, would go under. Not any band that sang about killing virgins, motorcycles, fire, sex, drinkin’ or dragons made of a virgin corpse orgy and motorcycles fueled by vodka. You get my point. Metal’s awesome, but calling a band Heavy Metal and only meaning a certain sound isn’t.
Too heavy for Heavy Metal.
Most will argue that Heavy Metal is anything before the subgenres were created, except for Sabbath, because Sabbath are so awesome they were Doom before Doom was even a though in Candlemass’ mind. Slayer, Metallica, all those greats managed to make it just as Thrash was being invented, thus being called Heavy Metal sometimes, but mostly agreed upon as Thrash Metal, which is fine. Venom’s Black Metal was barely Black metal at all, mixing Thrash and some Speed elements, which has earned it a good slap on the forehead to the tune of NWOBHM. Dammit Quorthon, you didn’t do it hard enough!
So I’ve danced around the point enough. Here it is: I will fight to the death anyone who argues that bands like Iron Maiden, Angel Witch, Manilla Road, Judas Priest, and Accept cannot be Power Metal. They have all the elements: Vocalists with pipes to rival the greater classical singers, speed, aggression, harmony, fantastical lyrics, fucktastically awesome album covers, and every modern Power Metal band takes their cues from them. Isn’t that evidence enough that what most people call “Heavy Metal” is usually just Power Metal? I like to bitch about how the words themselves are like nails on a chalkboard, and that even typing it makes me want to hurt myself, butthe greater crime is being too lazy to categorize old bands properly on the basis that it was too early for all the modern elements and yadda yadda yadda. I call it how I see it. Motörhead is Groove Metal, Iron Maiden is Power Metal, Slayer is Thrash, and so on.
Heavy Metal will never die, and make sure it stays that way. Keep your subgenres in check, and cheers, fuckers.